I doubt if C and I will talk again. Nobody wants a less-than-pleasing “breakup.” The sentiment we shouldn’t have added the “romance” in the first place I expressed to him; not feeling regretful about it all nevertheless. Deep inside, a fraction of good sense exists to have left him a better person bcz I built up his morale in every way I could during our better days.
Another important thing I’ve proven: One crucial question a woman should always ask herself before entering into an affair of the heart: “What has been his life before I came in?” The answer to that will ultimately give her the clarity she needs.
There is really something about standing by one’s values — the honesty and fidelity I’ve repeatedly imposed from men I had cherished. My constitution fosters the ideology any type of love affinity can only be true and authentic when faithfulness and commitment are present. How I can’t be in something that isn’t true. Boy am I glad to have stuck by those ideals one more time.
Writing this story has been cathartic. Soon after I released my story-letter, this week started with my pummeled interior easing off. I also feel like I’ve got my old life back. My days and nights are now chat-free — free of mere sweet slick talking which, in hindsight, was an unproductive use of my energy and time. No more restlessness over thoughts a “boyfriend” has been taking me for a ride. Nowadays, I can focus on my priorities and perform tasks and personal projects diligently.
I hope nothing like this will happen to me again. That I may never imperil my serenity with the remaining precious time left God has granted me.
Thank you, my dear friend, for allowing me to share what has pressed hard against my heart these past few weeks. What a privilege it’s been to be heard and understood once more by you.
Sincerely,
geena